O man- I am the quintessential Taurean Bull ( no guy ever wooed me with Linda Goodman charm, no wonder I cant boast of a string of men)- practical, dependable, strong and ..the broad strong shoulders.
I am NOT a woman meant for all the crappy , sentimental lines that people seem to be using everywhere. I hated reading Mills & Boons even as a hormonal teenager (never missed one though, coz you never knew which one would describe the most delicious kiss ever..some were steamy enough to move further), while Erich Segal, Danielle Steele are mucho recognized authors – I secretly love to scorn at their readers. Meanwhile, due to life’s constant pace, I do miss out reading the everyday newspaper – so many times, while people are having intelligent conversations about current affairs, sports, or whatever- I’m usually yelping away like a little puppy-‘Hello- I have no clue about Nuclear deals, IPL/ICL – can we change the topic please’. But in this new avatar of ‘devoting time to me’ (French manicures are my latest passion), I do read the Delhi Times (especially daily horoscope) and the Front Page of the TOI.
Apart from some depressing news about the Finance Minister finally warning everyone about the impending recession, today’s newspaper carried an almost half page advert of some bank that had a few lines about ‘Didi’ and how she saved ‘choti behan’ a seat and all that other emotional jazz. ‘What has that got to do with choosing a bank?’-I scorned at the ad and scooped out more yellow from the perfectly done sunny side up and indulged in a little Amul butter- after all – this is life, na?
I’ve gone about my usual work life today but the flashes don’t stop. Of her and me in 2 pigtails. Of me being the perennially good girl and she being the more popular one. Of she being small & delicate, of me being overgrown and awkward. Of her having a host of friends- I immersed in my story books. Of her proudly announcing how she was 3rd from the bottom in class ( like a state rank holder), I ,ashamed to tell my parents that I hadn’t made it to the top 3. Of me lugging her tiffin box to school ( coz ‘behan to choti hai’, na) and she completely carefree. Of me desperately changing the bedsheets when she wet her bed and not letting mom know, of her squealing in an instant- Didi ne pinch kiya. Of my Dad’s silly supplier who visited our house and proclaimed seeing her that ‘yeh ladki aapke liye bahut lucky hai’ and me looking on from the corner, distraughtly wanting to be the one that my Dad would favour. Of me finding my own hubby and then making sure that I found her one too.( that’s one of the few smart decisions of my life)
Somewhere along the way-I grudgingly accepted Neha as a good friend. Confiding in one another about boyfriends, first kisses and the frustrations of teenaged life. She learnt how to drive a car before me, managed to charm all my in laws at my marriage and indulged me with her first salary. Always a phone call away- she was a good vent for all my frustrations.
Today, Neha lives a few kilometers away from me. Like any mom, I live with the insecurity of who would look after my children, if ever anything happened to me- Neha hai na. When I am overwhelmed, she just completely takes over- I don’t think I can ever do that for her. She is a bundle of energy and can be irritatingly obliging. She marches me into a cosmetics corner and buys me the lipstick that I always wanted but thought it was just too expensive. She has dared me to find my own life- one that is not just about my husband & children, encouraged me to stop feeling weighed down by the responsibility of being the eldest child, she forces me to take the Friday evening off just to be on my own- she gave my hubby & me our 2nd honeymoon, by adopting the children completely for 10 days….oh the list goes own.
No – I don’t get senti- most of the days I just get irritated and boss over her, we bang down the phone on one another- atleast once in a week…do I love her? Yes- like any big sister should, but somewhere along the way she has turned into a wonderful friend, a great human being, a fantastic person- I am so proud of her.
Union Bank of India- here I come…
